''A LIFE WITHOUT YOU..''

^^..A LIFE WITHOUT YOU..^^
Life hurts SO much. I hate the feeling of not being happy! I hate being not the real me. I’ve been myself to ONE person and still am to that one person. Things feel like they change. How do they REALLY think about you? Do they even think of u at all? How do they feel about u? Do they feel completely different from what they tell u so they don’t hurt your feelings? There are so many questions but to scare to ask. I’m not a drama queen and I feel if i ask that i would be becoming one. Maybe I’m just paranoid...I need to grow some boobs and just face it. Why live the life not knowing and dying still wondering Id rather have someone hate me for asking then never knowing RIGHT? I’m sure most of u would agree with me. How can u find someone so perfect and knowing u don’t EVER have a chance with that person b/c your too nice, or your supposedly to pretty for them. i don’t want to be pretty anymore if i had the choice of being pretty or being with someone u really care and would die to be with. I’d pick being with that one person. Being pretty is only skin deep. Personality is ALWAYS there. If someone could just see me for me and not about how pretty I am (which isn’t true) or just because she’s a model I want to be someone/s life, dreams, and hopes. But u sits there thinking HES COMING BACK...is he really? Just put your life with God he knows everything. I was told to give up but i have a huge gut feeling saying u cant do that yet...it takes time right? God has always been there for me. I said I would drop it but then i got butterflies maybe It’s a sign not to drop it. i just want a chance, you cant fall in love with someone in a week month or maybe not even a year. It takes so much time. i know i said it but it was just massive feelings toward someone and when i said it i went numb. Sitting there thinking OMG what did i just do. i scared u away from me. I just pray i get my 2nd chance to share with you. i miss you so much. even though you wont read this. i care about u.I hope you do everything that is right for you. But i do want you to know one thing my favorite person...That is I’m always by your side NO MATTER what. I’m here for you to cry with and share each others future dreams with one another. If I die I’m your guardian angel. ill be the first star u see in the sky every night. Make your wish and ill help u get your wish no matter what it is. I care for you SO MUCH! don’t forget it. EVER...LOVE U DAT MUCH...=(